This paper explores the Khalīl al-Khūrī’s 1860 novel Way idhan, lastu bi-Ifranjī (Oh no, I am not European) as both a plea for and example of Arabic literary modernism. This novel is a biting satirical novel that parodies the growing impact of European influence on the Levant in the nineteenth century. In the first part, the narrator takes the reader on a tour from Beirut to Aleppo as he showcases the cultural colonialism taking hold in the Levant. The second part of the novel consists of a love triangle involving Edmond, a Frenchman hiding out in Aleppo, a young Syrian woman, Émilie, and her Arab cousin Asʿad. Her father Mīkhālī believes himself to be a European and wishes to marry her off to Edmond and not to her cousin Asʿad with whom she is initially in love. The two sections are brought together by a brief comedic excursus comparing the poetic achievements of the French writer and politician Alphonse de Lamartine (d. 1869) with those of the renowned Arabic poet Abū al-Ṭayyib al-Mutanabbī (d. 965). Through these sections, al-Khūrī sets the stage for a revitalized Arabic culture that maintains a critical distance from Europe, celebrates Arabic literary history, and looks towards a new and interconnected world.